If everybody minded their own business, the world would go around a great deal faster than it does.

I've been hesitant to use this quote because it seems kind of rude but the past two weeks have proven it to be perfect.  A lot of people I know have been so concerned with people or events that have no affect at all on their lives, yet they are emotionally affected by them.  Why?

Why would you let the actions or the laws of a state or country far away from you, that have no affect on your life at all, put you in a bad mood?  Why is it so important that your negative opinion be known when someone in a city far from your own did something that you don't like.  Seriously, that person is not concerned with you, why be concerned with them?

It's interesting to me, how as a society we are so concerned with everyone else.  And I'm not talking about international affairs, I'm talking about letting the actions of one person you don't even know affect you emotionally.  I mean have you seen social media the past two weeks?  Heaven forbid you disagree with anything anyone posted.  A lot of the posts begin with "Unfriend me if you disagree" which I'm sorry makes you just as much of a bigot because you're throwing your own opinion in everyone else's face without allowing them to have a conversation with you.  Why post anything if you don't want people to respond?  The thing I love about the people I'm close to is that we don't all think the same but we agree on what matters.  We all love each other and have respect for each others' opinions.    

I haven't posted a lot about recent events on my social media because my thoughts and opinions are not important.  None of the recent events affect me or my life personally and I choose to not open myself to unwanted hate from people who don't know me.  People are ugly, hateful and rude on all sides of the debates.  It's sad.  It's sad that people will ruin friendships and relationships because they think differently than someone else.  Why are we so immature that a healthy debate severs ties instead of broadening our own thinking like it's supposed to?  Why are we so dramatic? 

I guess it's interesting to me because I am in the entertainment industry.  As an actress, the goal is to continue working.  You continue working by being in the public eye.  Once people stop caring about you, you're irrelevant and the struggle to be seen starts all over again.  Actors really have no lives separate from their jobs because people always want to see them.  So we have to make sure that you always see us the way we want you to see us.  So in that sense, I really don't get to have an opinion about anything.  Because one day, when I'm on my own show someone will look back at my Facebook from 2015 and say that I said "..." about "..." and my career is over.  Not really but I could lose a lot of my future fans by what I post now.  It's crazy but it's true.  Wouldn't it be nice if we could all just be ourselves and love each other for who we are?  Wouldn't it be great if we were more concerned with our own lives progressing instead of constantly worrying about what someone else is doing?  I think we'd all be a lot happier and the world WOULD go around a great deal faster than it does.  

Just a thought.
Love,
Kimberly

"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice. "You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn't have come here."

It's always funny talking to other people about LA.  Everyone has a very specific opinion about this city whether they've been here or not.  Most people assume that LA is full of spoiled brat, rich people or failed actors.  Bottom line, you'd have to be crazy to live here and mad to love it!  

I guess I should put it out there that I am mad.  I think LA is a wonderful place.  It has its ups and downs just like every city but there are so many opportunities here!  So many avenues to create and collaborate with brilliant people everywhere you go!  There are so many creative people in this town and we can let our creativity run free without feeling out of place.  Themed parties, networking cocktails and collaborative hangouts are a part of my daily life!

Most misconceptions of LALA Land come from what everyone sees on TV or in the tabloids, etc.  People forget that the main industry in LA is entertainment so everything you're fed about this city is anything that will make money.  Failed marriages, gossip, "Real Housewives" garbage that those of us who live here honestly ignore.  Who is Taylor Swift dating?  I have no idea because I'm working 20 hours a day to make my own stuff happen.

We're "lost" because our daily schedules include working out, yoga and very strict diets.   It has nothing to do with the fact that maybe we'd like to live longer, a few extra pounds makes a huge difference on camera and doing yoga keeps your muscles healthy and your mood stable?  The truth is, LA does have a lot of lost people but it has a lot of driven, motivated people that I am thankful to be around.  I'm challenged here and surrounded by people that not only push me to do more, they also hold me up if I fall.  

So yeah, we're mad because our lives move fast out here and we're all career driven but it's all for the sake of entertainment.  God gave me a passion to entertain and I'm going to do it no matter what.  So just remember that everything you see about LA is entertaining you.  Whether it makes you happy, sad, angry, or confused, your emotions have been manipulated to make you crave more.  It's what we do and it's why you can't get enough.

To be continued...

Kimberly      

"Either it brings tears to their eyes or else..."

"Or else what?" said Alice for the Knight had made a sudden pause.
"Or else it doesn't, you know."

Just a warning, I'm going to get super actory in this entry!  I could go a lot of different routes with this quote but I'm going to write today about my acting class yesterday.

So, as an actress I get misunderstood a lot.  Not so much misunderstood in the literal sense of what I say but misunderstood in how I operate.  I am an extremely emotional being.  My emotions remain at a peaked level so that I can easily access them.  I've actually always been this way but I've learned to harness my emotions and keep them just under the surface so that they are there when I need them.  The problem, well it's not a problem for me, for others is that I am an open book.  And for the first time yesterday in class, we discussed how important it is to be this open.

I'm not saying that every actor or actress has to tell everything about themselves or communicate as much as I do, but for me it helps to have nothing weighing on my thoughts.  So the scene we did yesterday was from a new film and it was heavily emotional.  In four pages I went from anger to extreme sadness to happy then back to sad.  It was glorious!  Seriously, I live for these kinds of scenes because they are a workout.  My emotions are like muscles for me and I need to exercise them regularly.  Where I falter is breaking out of the emotions as quickly as I can get in them.  Sometimes casting will ask you to do something over again and if I have to jump out of sad to anger cleanly, well let's just say yesterday I couldn't.

It's interesting to see how other actors operate because one of the girls was worried about going to such an emotional place without hurting her psyche.  I wondered how I would explain to someone how I get there without affecting myself but I honestly don't know.  I guess it's just one of those things that comes so naturally to me.  Maybe I just stopped fighting my emotions so long ago that now they are free flowing all the time.  HA!  I'm like the Hulk only with tears.  My secret is, I'm always crying.  Not really but oh, that just made me so happy.

I guess my point is that everyone responds to emotions differently and there is no right or wrong way.  Either it brings tears to your eyes, or else it doesn't.  That's just how you handle them.  But the great thing about working with other actors is that you can see someone handle a situation with tears and it's beautiful and you can see someone handle the very same situation without tears but still with the same level of emotion and it's is just as interesting.  There really is no correct way when it comes to acting and all of these discoveries yesterday just filled me with a new freedom.

So now I have a new assignment.  I have to find my trigger out or my off switch if you will.  Something that can easily pull me out of my emotional state because ultimately, I am still acting.  I also get to now study emotions without tears.  YEAH!  I want to understand being just as emotional without tears flowing because how powerful could that be?!  Such is the life of an actress :)

Thanks for reading!
Love ya!
Kimberly

The best gift you could have given her was a lifetime of adventures...

So today is my birthday!  I'm so full of love and joy right now and not just because of all of the messages I've been getting from everyone but because I am living a truly blessed life.  I'm so grateful for everyone that has supported me and is helping me move forward to make my dreams come true.  You all are truly giving me the best gift ever in reminding me everyday that I can do anything.  There are so many adventures still to come but I'm so happy for the ones I've already had!  So many lessons have been learned and experiences that I never would have imagined I'd have 15 years ago!  

It's so funny because when I was growing up and all through high school, I never would have imagined that I'd be where I am now.  But the one nice thing about being born in May is that makes me a Taurus.  And no, I don't believe that my future is controlled by the stars but I will say that I fit the Taurus breakdown perfectly!  I am persistent, loving, passionate...oh so passionate!  If you tell me I can't do something, congratulations you have just set out a challenge for me to prove you wrong...and I will.  I actually look for challenges because I love to prove people wrong when it comes to their perception of me.  I'm persistent, I don't back down.  :)

But I have also grown to love adventures.  As a Taurus, I hate change.  I like having a plan and making plans.  Even my best friends will tell you that I plan out everything and if something in my plan has to change, I am upset until I can devise a new plan to allow for the change.  But I'm growing to allow for changes and somewhat learning to embrace them.  Because without changes and adventures, I can't grow.  I can't be the force I was born to be.  

One of my favorite quotes is from John Newton:

"I am not what I ought to be.  I am not what I want to be.  I am not what I hope to be.  But still, I am not what I used to be.  And by the grace of God, I am what I am."

I love it because it reminds me to shake off the past and keep working towards the future I was meant to have.  

So thank you for giving me the opportunity to have such an amazing life!  I'm so thankful for all of your continued love and support!  I can't wait to create amazing works for you and I hope you'll be proud of them.  

Here's to so many more brilliant adventures!

Cheers,

Kimberly 

"...she looked back once or twice, half hoping that they would call after her."

I love this part of the story where Alice leaves the Mad Tea Party.  Actually I love most of the Mad Tea Party because it's such a great example of how people misunderstand each other because of different ways of thinking.  As Alice gets frustrated and stomps out of the party, she looks back.  She looks back because she wants them to call her back to the party.  She wants to be missed before she is even gone.  

It's funny how much this quote touches me because I've had to leave many things and people in the past but I've tended to look back hoping that I am missed.  Even when the situation or the person is unhealthy for me and I know I'm better off, I'm still Alice looking back hoping that I am too important to let go.

That being said, I have left that life behind me.  I think it comes from being an entertainer that you always need to feel wanted or needed.  But it's also a sign of immaturity.  It took me a long time to be at peace with me and to let go of the people and the places that are not good fits.  As they say, more appropriately with people, you have to move on from someone without expecting it to change their mind, otherwise you're not moving on.  You're pretending to move on but looking back the entire time, making yourself worse off than before.  That's a hard pill to swallow.

The Mad Tea Party has always been one of my favorite parts of Alice in Wonderland because it reminds me to be more open minded.  How fun and crazy are the Hatter and the Hare?  But because they are so different, Alice gets frustrated and leaves.  But I think a part of her knows that although they are fun, they are not helping her get where she needs to be.  Woah, I just had an epiphany as I typed that!  How hard is it to really leave people that we love and adore when they are holding us back from where we are going?  Maybe not even intentionally but with them we stay in a stagnant place with a false happiness.  I for one want to take everyone with me on my journey through Wonderland but I know I can't.  Sometimes it's so hard to decipher who belongs and who you have to leave behind.  When you're such a loving person, it's hard to justify removing someone from your life.  You have so much love to give to everyone whether they want it or not.  But ultimately, if they don't return it, you're draining yourself to make someone else happy.  

Anywhoooooo, I think I'll end on that note because this could get deeper than I'm willing to go right now in a blog :p  But I'll leave today by saying, it's acceptable to leave the places that are keeping you from where you need to be.  But leave knowing that you will be better off, not because you hope that you will leave an impression and change where you have been.  Never look back because you'll miss what's ahead of you.

Love you,
Kimberly

Alice thought to herself "I don't see how he can ever finish, if he doesn't begin."

Last night I had the pleasure of going to see Avengers: Age of Ultron early with a friend of mine and one of the Executive Producers gave a little speech before the movie began.  Her speech was humorous but also very inspiring.  She told us all to not only follow our dreams but always do what we're passionate about.  Because if you're passionate about something and you're not doing it, then a part of you is dying.  She went on to say that too many people use excuses why they can't do what they're passionate about right now and how they will one day...

For me, if I'm not creating, I'm lost.  If I don't have a script to dive into and a character to fill then I'm nothing.  The main reason I'm making my own web series and films is because it's so hard to be seen and to get a foot in the door out here.  That and I'm very impatient, I've said that before.  So instead of waiting and working hard to get that role that will make all the difference, I'm working smarter and giving myself the projects that will make me thrive!  

Don't get me wrong, this is not a brag fest.  It hit me hard when she said last night that people make excuses and talk about how "one day" they'll make it.  But these same people are doing nothing to make their dreams happen!  I see these people everywhere!  One day I'll be famous, one day I'll be rich, one day I'll get out of debt, one day I'll be skinny...but what are these people doing TODAY to change anything?  Most of them nothing.  And it's frustrating when you know that they deserve better and really want them to live up to their full potential. 

So I love this quote because you can never finish if you don't begin.  And I will no longer say that "one day I'll make it" hoping that something will come along because I am making those things come along.  And I WILL make it.  So if this blog can do anything for you today, I really hope it inspires you to make a choice to stop procrastinating when it comes to your passions and dreams.  Change doesn't happen overnight but it also doesn't happen without a first step.  So whatever it is that you're putting off or waiting for some miracle to bring to you, start it now!  Go begin writing that script, start putting money into a savings account, go walk for an hour, do anything you can but start it now.  No one else is going to make your dreams happen for you and you won't get there if you don't start now.

The difference between a dreamer and a visionary is action.

Love you!
Kimberly 

You would have to be half mad to dream me up.

I sometimes wonder if what goes on in my head is anything near what goes on in others' heads.  I've noticed that I am motivated and happiest when I am faced with a challenge.  I think sometimes I even find ways to make simple things challenging so I can have more fun with them.

If you had asked me two years ago what I'd be doing this Summer, I can promise you that producing a film would not have been my response!  My impatience and desire to control my career have finally collided and it's brilliant!  I can tell you that it's going to be difficult but so exciting!  My newest challenge with the film might be biting off more than I can chew but I'm ready for it.  It's funny because people see me as a strong, capable person which I definitely am, but those closest to me know that I have different personalities when faced with a challenge.  I let it tear me down before I even face it.  It's like I have to get all of the possibility of failure out of my system before I decide to succeed and charge through at full force.  I'm a bit of an enigma and sometimes I fascinate myself.  It might make me a little delusional but why be hindered by the idea of failure?  It's not an option if you want to succeed.  

Oh, did I mention I'm also an over sharer?  Obviously.  I am the most open book you will ever meet!  I just don't keep things to myself.  There's way too much going on and progressing in my mind to keep anything inside.  I'm sure there's some mystery to me somewhere but I feel better when people know everything about me.  Unless I don't know you then you get nothing from me.  Ha!  I might need to work on that but oh well!  

God was a little crazy when He made me but I'm so thankful He made me the way I am.  I can't imagine being anyone else and I'm so grateful.  I love my life and can't wait to really be something that others can be motivate by.  I can promise you that everything happening right now is just the beginning.  My best quality is my persistence.  I will never quit chasing the white rabbit.