I
think the way we view our past is a little backwards. We’re definitely supposed to learn from our
past but too many people hold on to it as an example to follow to understand
the future. The funny thing is, how many
times do situations or plans ever go exactly like they have in the past? Almost never.
Our past teaches us lessons and makes us smarter but how can we really
expect that things will always turn out the same.
For
me, I think the past has always held me back.
I’m definitely one of those people that expect things to turn out the same. I have a tendency to resist change. Sometimes I still see myself as the chubby,
lazy girl that never quite fit in. But
no one else sees or ever saw me that way.
And thinking this way has such a profound effect on my self-esteem that
it’s detrimental to future successes. I
have never run a marathon and right now I’m training for a half. This weekend I had to do an 8 mile run which
was scary because I have never actually run that far. But I did it!
I actually got through it but all the time leading up to it I thought
this is going to be so hard! I’ll never
get through it! But I did! So why do I think that way? Why does my brain, instead of looking at the
successes I’ve made, and knowing that I can push myself to achieve more, choose
to hold on to the negativity of my past?
Why do any of us do this for that matter?
So by
saying I can’t go back to yesterday, I am telling the truth. I can not physically go back to
yesterday. And I don’t want to because yesterday
I had surgery on my tooth but for once, I didn’t pass out! I’m getting better! Everything is different about me today than
it was yesterday so my new goal is to look forward and never backward. I challenge you to do the same thing. Learn from your mistakes but keep them in the
back of your mind. You learned those
lessons so know that you know them and move on.
Look towards the future and know that you can make it different from
your past.
It’s
funny that I have been a Christian my entire life and I’m just now starting to really
understand the importance of God in my life.
Before it was always like, I had this great power protecting me and
watching over me as I walk through the challenges of my life. But it’s not like that at all. It’s more like I have a partner going through them with me, a best friend that is by my side the entire time. As I said earlier I had surgery yesterday and
it never fails that if I am dealing with intense pain, I pass out. And it sucks.
I have passed out so many times in my life and it takes me soooooo long
to recover so I was determined to figure out how to avoid it this time! The Xanax helped some but I decided the
entire surgery to stay in prayer. And I did. I had such a long conversation with God
thanking him for being with me and thanking him for making me the strong person
that I have grown to be. It was incredible. Not once did my mind go to that place of fear
and panic. And with God there with me, I
figured out how to shake my past!
Ok, I
think I’ve gone on long enough here. So
I’ll end with saying strive for more than your past. Expect different outcomes each day. Expect miracles! I know I am because God is with me.
Don’t forget I have a movie funding campaign coming up in two weeks and
I for one am not looking to my past and expecting to fail. I know we’ll succeed and I can’t wait to be
able to not only make and star in my own film but to really show everyone that
if you put your mind to anything, you will succeed! Don’t forget your past but really, forget your past!
Love,
Kimberly
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