This post might honestly be harder for me than I’d hoped for but I guess c’est la vie. That’s life. I have always loved Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee, not really sure why but I have. And this particular quote struck me extra hard today so I figured I have to write about it.
It’s funny how no matter how old I get or how mature I think I am, there are still certain faults that are hard for me to break. I am super emotional and on top of that extremely extroverted. I don’t keep things to myself very often so when I have something on my mind or something is bothering me, I have to tell someone…or everyone. I’m terrible at keeping secrets or surprises. I mean, I’m blogging about my emotions right now for anyone who wants to read about them! And I guess the reason I like to share my emotions is because the more I share, the more I think people will understand where I’m coming from, how I really feel…make myself seem like more of a real person. Because when I keep my emotions in, I feel set apart from everyone else and no one understands me. So I share and I emote and I cry to make myself seem more real to others.
The sad thing is it often has the opposite effect. I share too much and people around me get overwhelmed. They leave or they push me away because they don’t feel the same or just don’t know how to deal with all of me.
But what I’m learning is that it’s not a fault that I have to fix. It’s the way I was created. It's just me being me. And in life there will be a LOT of people that will not be able to take all of you as you are, and that’s ok. Those people are not meant to stay in your life. You take the lessons you were meant to learn and you move on. It's hard and it hurts but it's the truth.
So, no crying won't make me more real and in the end, there really isn't anything to cry about, but sometimes it's just what I need to do. So thank you God for making me the way I am and thank you to my friends who stick by me through all of my emotional roller-coasters.
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